Next time if you going to Singapore, you need to drink MILF with this Uncle. PB is guaranteed…LOL
Conversations with Singaporean Taxi Drivers No. 48: This week: Uncle Han (Taxi no. XXXX) on Modern Art, TB and MILF
by Farish A Noor on Tuesday, 15 February 2011 at 14:05
As part of our on-going research project on urban ethnography, this week we feature another conversation with one of Singapore's colourful taxi drivers.
This week's driver is Uncle Han (taxi no. xxxx) who talks about Modern Art, Naked artists and the virtues of Milf.
Uncle H: "Waaah... you see or not that feller at the art museum ah? Dat one la- see there in the paper, got photo mah. Dat feller go naked at the art gallery, some more people come to take photo you know what?
Haiya- What kind of art is that??? One kind la, I tell you - These people they call artists ah, but I tell you Uncle dont believe in this modern art wan.
Where got??
Where got la??
You know the feller come here, and then they let him go naked in the gallery, sit behind the curtain some more. Then got people come to see, must pay money wan. Then got photographer from the newspaper go take picture some more- Dere- dere look la, see yourself. De feller all naked then the woman go interview him, write article, make him more famous. DAT you call Modern art ah?? Where got sense wan?? Basket!@#@!!!!
I tell you ah, you professor so you know la- Here got no such thing as Modern art la! What if Uncle go naked at Orchard road, walking-walking near Takashimaya like dat, all naked. Then what?? Crazy ma!!!
Then when police come to arrest Uncle, what to say, what to do? Say to them 'no you cannot arrest me, this is modern art ma- Some more I modern artist'. What??? Basket@!#@!! You think they believe me ah? Go straight to lock-up for sure wan!
So where got modern art??
Some more Uncle look at the photo in the paper la. Not that I want to look, but I look la- Coffee time, no customer, Uncle oso tired, so just look-look for interesting news la.
Then Uncle see the feller like dat naked in the gallery- Waalao- Uncle oso think: Like dis ah, Modern art??? If the feller look hansome like the Bollywood feller Shaka Khan okey la- But LOOK at the feller!! Skinny feller like TB patient only, oso like dat can be Modern art ah?? WHERE GOT SENSE LA??? No got! No modern art!
If you want to go naked you excercise first la, not be like those anoxia people dont like to eat wan. Give them food, they dont want to eat, so end up like this skinny feller la. Then become modern artist! Basket!!@#$%!!!!
Uncle keep fit you know? You know Uncle oredi sixty years old- terrer what? See Uncle steady only, not like these NS fellers, so young already cannot run. Uncle steady only, people see oso say to Uncle 'Alamak Uncle you terrer la!' You know my secret ah? Every morning Uncle drink milf!
Me: "Uncle drink what???"
Uncle: "Milf la! Uncle drink Milf every morning!
(If you can have a milf every morning then you must be doing something right Uncle.)
"Ya la, every morning one glass of Milf!
(Good God, he liquifies them in a blender???)
"DAT is Uncle's secret! You want to be terrer like Uncle later when you get old, can drive midnight taxi some more, nobody dare kacau-kacau Uncle! DAT is the secret- you drink milf ok?
Ok, sampai oredi: That will be 12 dollar 50 cent. Happy Valentine day ok!"
Taken from Dr. Farish Noor’s Facebook
http://www.facebook.com/home.php#!/note.php?note_id=502024717594&id=581202553
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